Someday We'll Know
by staffy08
Summary: Rory's thoughts about the men in her life.
1. Chapter 1

_AN: Sooo... this is my first and most probably last/only Gilmore Girls fic, not entirely sure what inspired me to write it but whatever it was wouldn't leave me alone until the fic was finished. _

_Originally I was just going to post it as a one-shot but like most of my original plans that went down the drain... Each chapter refers to a different man in Rory's life or should I say love life. I'm interested to see who you guys think of as you read each chapter. :)_

_The title 'Someday We'll Know' is a song by The New Radicals._

_Enjoy!... I hope... *hides*_

**'Someday We'll Know'**

He's your soul mate.

No doubt about it. No question in your mind. No second guessing it. No rethinking it.

It's a fact, a given. As simple as that.

The question is of course, what's your definition of a soul mate?

A person that can read your mind, predict your every move, finish your sentences. Likes everything you like, hates everything you hate, has the same hobbies and fears as yourself.

No.

That's a cliché. Total junk.

A soul mate, your soul mate, _he_ knows you like no other. The house you go to when things go wrong belongs to him, the shoulder you cry on when your world collapses is his. He knows you, possibly even better than you know yourself. He knows your habits, good and bad, he knows all your little quirks that set you apart from the rest of the world. He knows when to listen, when to talk, when to pull you into a hug and when to slap some sense into you.

He laughs when you fall flat on your ass but he'll reach down and help you up before his laughter has subsided.

He'll take the piss when you fail a test but he'll be there studying with you into the early hours of the morning for the next one.

He'll rant and rave when you don't tell him what upsets you but he'll order pizza and watch chick flicks with you until your sorrow goes away.

And while you have yet to test this theory, no doubt he'd help you bury a body, get rid of the evidence and give you an alibi without a second thought.

He loves you and you love him.

But there are different ways to love a person.

The love between mother and daughter is different than that between husband and wife or brother and sister.

And the love you have for him is different than that between lovers.

You don't love him like a friend, brother, lover or boyfriend. You simply love _him_.

Maybe that love confused you so many years ago, maybe you couldn't tell the difference back then, maybe that's why your relationship seemed so right and yet so wrong.

He left.

He came back.

But the confusion never went away. He told you that he loved you. You remained quiet, your mouth firmly shut. Didn't he see? You loved him too. So much. But not like that, just not in _that_ way.

He left.

He came back. _He always comes back_.

If ever so briefly.

Months had gone by since you last saw him, you'd changed, he'd changed. But he still knew you. Mere hours into your reunion he had stepped up and told you what you'd needed to hear. He reminded you of the person that you once were and of the person that you had wanted to become – both were so far away from who you were that day.

He left.

This time he didn't come back. Instead you went to him. You needed to know, needed to finally _not_ be confused anymore.

You found what you'd been looking for. Unfortunately he hadn't, not yet. He was still confused.

Soul mates and romance didn't have to go hand in hand.

_You_ left, this time. Time. That's all he needed.

You will see him again, in time.


	2. Chapter 2

Was he the one that got away?

Maybe. Maybe not.

His name alone was connected to so many 'what ifs' it made your head spin just thinking about it, him.

You hadn't liked him.

You decided that the second you lay eyes on him.

He made fun of you, annoyed you, taunted and teased you. He seemed to have made it his life's mission to make your day _that_ bit worse.

He scared you.

He was everything you weren't and secretly you thought, maybe some things you wanted to be.

The money factor was one of the many things that separated the two of you.

He was confident, sure of himself, comfortable in his own skin, he loved attention. He was intelligent, though he never showed it. He was quick witted and always had an immediate response and comeback for whatever crazy thing spurred from your mouth.

At some point in time you'd gone from dreading you daily ping-pong game of snarky sarcastic comments to actually enjoying and looking forward to them.

Things had been looking up.

But then there was _that_ night, _that _party, _that _room, _that_ conversation, _that_ understanding, _that _moment.

_That kiss._

You ignored it.

Pretended it didn't happen, told that little voice in your head _to bloody well sod off_.

Before you knew what was happening he was leaving.

_What?_

Not by choice, but leaving all the same.

You hadn't had the time to sort through the jumble of feelings and emotions floating around in your head.

You didn't have to.

He was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

He was your friend.

He was a part of your life for only the briefest of moments like many others but that didn't mean you would forget him.

There's friends and then there's _friends_. He wasn't the latter.

At every stage in life you meet people, new people and you make friends with said people.

Some will stick by you, some you'll take with you to your next stage in life. But some weren't ment to come any further.

He wasn't. He didn't.

You slowly drifted apart. It was the best way.

Like rolling a ball down the stairs. It lands at the bottom all the same but it's better to have taken the slow bumpy road down that to have just been thrown down from the top.

More time consuming.

Less painful?


	4. Chapter 4

He was the one.

He was the Romeo to your Juliet, Jack to your Rose, Mr. Darcy to your Elizabeth.

He pushed his way into your life, into your heart.

Since the day you met him he'd challenged you in every way, shape and form. He brought out the best and the worst in you. He showed you a side of yourself that you didn't know existed or maybe you simply never had the courage to show it.

He made you feel alive.

Around him you'd felt like everything was possible, that you could do anything you wanted with only the sky as your limit.

He intrigued you.

He was smart, so much smarter than you. He was just as capable of having an intellectual conversation as he was getting drunk and making an utter fool of himself.

You liked him. And the bastard knew it.

Money or no money you came from two different worlds, lived in two different worlds, on opposite sides of a valley with only a small bridge connecting you.

You took a step.

So did he.

Sometimes you'd take a step back but you'd be stepping forward again not long after.

You were coming towards each other on the bridge, step by step, slowly but surely.

He met you in the middle, halfway between his world and yours.

You were happy there, at that moment, as you stood in the middle. Content.

But neither of you stood still. You both kept walking, step by step, moving away from each other. Moving to the other side of the bridge, the other world.

He to your world and you to his.

You'd wanted to see his world, experience new things, live your young life to its fullest.

But he'd been there, done that. He'd had his experiences, he'd seen what that world had to offer. He was in your world – he was ready to settle down, be the grown up he'd become since meeting you.

He didn't want to wait.

You needed more time to explore.

The bridge was still there.

Maybe you'd meet again, in the middle, some day, some day but not today.


	5. Chapter 5

He was your first.

First everything.

First to make you blush, first to make you stutter, first to make your heart beat faster and your breathing become quicker.

First to love you as something other than a friend, daughter or granddaughter.

The first to kiss you, first to make love to you.

But the thing with the word 'first' is that it implies that there's a second and a third and a fourth, and there was.

He was like a pair of skinny jeans from your teenage years still in the bottom of your cupboard, an item which you simply couldn't through away, just in case they fit again one day, because you once loved them so.

He was such a big part of your life for so long that it was scary to let him go, the mere thought of letting him go, of starting something new sent shivers down your spine. He was a safety net, stored away in the cupboard ready to be pulled out whenever necessary.

Like stabilizers on a kid's bike, you didn't take them off until you were absolutely sure everything was going to be okay without them.

But that wasn't fair.

And you knew it.

He'll always be somewhere in your head, in your heart. After all, he _is_your first.

But the thing is, if you come first, you can't come last.

* * *

_AN: Thank you for reading._


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